Carlos Dunlap, the defensive MVP of last year’s BCS National Championship Game, was arrested at 3:58 a.m. Tuesday on DUI charges.

I ran this post in 2008 and will continue to do so every Thanksgiving as long as this blog is in existence.

Except to UVA players, fans, family and alumni. Go fuck yourselves.

Gobbler Country put up his Thanksgiving dinner power poll. Great idea, but it was weak. For a real mans poll continue reading. (His post this year is better.)

1. Gravy and mashed potatos
2. turnips and gravy
3. cream of gravy soup
4. potato caserole and gravy
5. Bacon, brussel sprouts and gravy
6. Warm Gravy
7. Dressing (cornbread stuffing) and gravy
8. Stuffing and gravy
9. Shrimp and gravy
10. cranberry sauce and gravy
11. Iced Gravy (eat with spoon)
12. Any type of pie doused with gravy

Ever wish you could take a Jägermeister shot machine with you camping, tailgating, and partying?

Yes, yes and yes. The provided convenience will also allow me to obnoxiously enjoy licorice flavored bliss at funerals, business luncheons, my barber shop, on a boat and at Christenings. Everyone knows Jesus was a Jager loving deity.

Available as a six-bottle value pack, the cooler has plenty of room for all six bottles, ice, and the requisite cans of Red Bull, and uses the same tech as the Jägermeister Tap Machine to deliver ice-cold shots straight from the external tap.

Gentleman, is their any debate over which cooler to buy in 2009?

Jägermeister 6-Bottle Shot Cooler | Uncrate

Yup they’ve got ham aids. And no it’s not caused from pig fucking.

While some affected players had already returned to practice, Cutcliffe said there were other still battling the flu-like symptoms. Citing HIPAA laws, he would not name players who had been impacted, though he said typical bouts have lasted two to three days, with some players needing quarantine.
…
Duke football head trainer Hap Zarzour said all cases have been “mild” with symptoms ranging from a cough to chest congestion to high fevers. He said one player had been officially tested and diagnosed with the H1N1 virus. Other players, he said, are presumed to have it.

Get well, get well soon we wish you to get well.

F4H is polling the ACC blogosphere for the following:

• predicted order of finish for both divisions (no ties please)
• conference champion
• preseason opoy
• preseason dpoy
• preseason roy

No ties please? Seriously… In a fucking conference ruled by the iron fist of parity I cannot predict a tie for what has to be simplicity’s sake.  Curses to you F4H! Continue Reading “ACC Preseason Predictions” »

Aaron Corp you say? Indeed we did. Corp is starting to separate himself from the pack of USC quarterbacks looking to replace Mark Sanchez. The safe money was on either Arkansas transfer Mitch Mustain or freshman Matt Barkley, but Corp has looked impressive throwing and, gasp, running the ball.

“They’re plays that John David or Mark might have gotten sacked on,” Galippo said. “Aaron’s side-stepping, taking off and running for first downs.”

The only Bourbon that isn’t Bullshit!

If you are drinking anything else at a Kentucky tailgate this fall you will be ostracized and shamed. GC wonders why Beamer isn’t using his mug to sell booze. Legitimate question.

Lennon Creer will transfer out of Tennessee. Bryce Brown and David Oku are enrolling in the fall and the current crop of back have been outperforming him this spring.  So, the heavily recruited 4-star back will finish up the semester and then peace out.

Here’s a movement we can all get behind

Around the Interwebs is a whenever-the-eff-I-feel-like-it-a-week summary of the day’s news in college football. If you’d like your link to appear email it to cgb [at] collegegameaballs [dot] com.

Furrer4Heisman at Gobbler Country is hosting a roundtable to discuss the Hokies this spring. I respect the hard work that he has put into getting this together so much  that I decided to drink before, during and after answering the questions.

Question number one comes from reader Riggs: “Are we really going to be that good next year? I just don’t see us being a top 10 team given last season’s offensive output. Tell me that we’re overhauling the offense, or we’re adding new packages. Give me some hope.”

Riggs, Riggs, Riggs either you’re a glutton for pain (read BSDM), naive or haven’t been a follower of Hokie football for too long. Are we really going to be that good next year? On paper we are a top 5 team. We are returning all of our skill positions, bringing new offensive weapons like Ryan Williams, have an even more experienced offensive line than last year’s and a Bud Foster coached defense. With that being said we aren’t going undefeated and more than likely will shit the bed against Alabama and 1-2 ACC teams. Why because unfortunately we aren’t overhauling our offense and even more importantly Bryan Stinespring is still calling the plays. In my inebriated state I actually starting to think our offensive scheme works, we just call really dumb plays at the worst times. Like QB sneaking out of the shotgun on 3rd and goal from the one. We always seem to shoot ourselves in the foot. Continue Reading “Virginia Tech Hokies Spring Football Roundtable” »

 

And that’s exactly what these guys did… Ryan Mallet was arrested on a public intoxication charge, Ohio State freshman Mike Adams and J.B. Shugarts will appear in court this week to face a misdemeanor charge of possession of drug paraphernalia and Iowa football player Shaun Prater was cited for drunken driving early Saturday and has been suspended indefinitely from the team. Get Fucked Up!

A mysterious white powder is falling on Auburn, Alabama. The locals acted quickly to cover up and protect their beloved Jordan-Hare Stadium. After learning it was no threat they became enamored and playful with the heavenly dust. Who knows if this will happen their too?

Around the Interwebs is a whenever-the-eff-I-feel-like-it-a-week summary of the day’s news in college football. If you’de like your link to appear email it to cgb [at] collegegameaballs [dot] com.

furrer4heisman is sporting wood over Heather Dinich’s interview with Ryan Williams. From HD’s interview.

An obvious question from Virginia Tech fans and myself is, OK, now what do you do with you AND Darren Evans?

RW: Man, oh man. I really do not know. If people notice, me and Darren are two different types of running backs.

How so?

RW: Totally different. Darren, he is just a workhorse. I think he’d rather hit you than get hit. He’s just solid. He’s an aggressive running back, very straight up, hit the hole, and just go about his business. I’m the total opposite. I’d rather make moves and not get hit. Not that I don’t like contact, but I’d rather use my vision and agility to get around defenders. I create my own holes if holes aren’t there with my feet, not my body. But I feel like once we get everything down pat, it will be dangerous with me, Darren and Tyrod in the backfield. That’s something I feel like a lot of defenses will not want to mess with at all. It will be ridiculous. I can’t wait. Right now, I have the starting punt return job, so I’ll be on the field as far as punt return, but I’ve been saying little things to the coaches here and there about playing me at wide receiver, and I don’t know if you noticed or paid attention to the Wild Turkey package with [tight end Greg] Boone.

Oh yeah.

RW: Yeah, I want to get into that. I just want to be used for everything. I want to be the most dangerous person on the field at all times.

I am just as anxious as him to watch our offense next year.

Hopefully this means he’ll be a Percy Harvin-type player for the Hokies next year, getting the ball anyway we can get it to him. And with a power run game to back it up with Darren Evans, I’m starting to drink the Kool Aid believe when it comes to our offense next season.

If we aren’t at least a top 50 offensive team Stinespring will be public enemy number one in Blacksburg.

Don’t drink and Mormon.

At least two BYU football players are being investigated for violating the school’s strict honor code, BYU spokeswoman Carri Jenkins confirmed Tuesday.

The inquiry was made because various sources have told The Tribune that freshman safety Shiloah Te’o and freshman receiver O’Neill Chambers were involved in at least one off-campus get-together where alchohol was present and available. Personally consuming alcohol, or being present where alcohol is being consumed by others, such as at a party, club or establishment whose main purpose is to serve/provide alcohol, is a violation of the honor code.

Steve Spurrier won the Heisman Trophy when all the black guys were in Vietnam.

This video has everything: degrading of The South, a Bobby Bowden impersonation and a follow up by Orson.

 

Around the Interwebs is a whenever-the-eff-I-feel-like-it-a-week summary of the day’s news in college football. If you’de like your link to appear email it to cgb [at] collegegameaballs [dot] com.