CollegeGameBalls: College Football at its Finest

In case we all don’t know the concept of Bowl Mania I will take a second to explain. Pick the winner of every bowl game with a unique confidence (1-32) and earn those confidence points with each correct pick.

32. Kansas v Virginia Tech

Why? Kansas is overrated as fuck. They beat absolutely no one while Virginia Tech has had to overcome adversity and defeat quality opponents on rout to their 2nd ACC Championship

Why Not? There is no why not. This is my most confident pick. I will not be wrong.

31. Illinois v USC

Why? USC is ten fold more talented and their head coach can actually coach a big game.

Why Not? The Zooker is more unpredictable than a dirty bomb. He could pull out a Juice Williams tailored bag of tricks and pull it out.

30. Ball State v Rutgers

Why? Ball State sucks. If you were to test my fandom by asking me where Ball State is located I’de have to immediately change the subject.

Why Not? Ray Rice could break a leg…

29. Michigan v Florida

Why? Michigan cannot stop the spread and Florida has the best spread QB ever.

Why Not? It’s fucking Lllloyd Carr’s last game. Surely he has something other than a halftime interview snub in his back pocket.

28. Boise St v East Carolina

Why? Ian Johnson.

Why Not? Father Lou may have given son Skip a pep talk. Hahahaha I am so drunk I am making myself laugh. Fucking Lou Holtz is a senile old fuck. How many times do you think Mark May has just wanted to spear him? I bet 274.

27. South Florida v Oregon

Why? Dennis Dixon isn’t playing.

Why Not? Shit, Oregon players could have gotten their hands on some sort of performance enhancing marijuana.

26. LSU v Ohio State

Why? LSU has earned it. They have played tough all year long and will finally be healthy. The last time they were healthy they shat on VT.

Why Not? As much as I hate to admit it Tressel is a good head coach and wants to show last year wasn’t a fluke.

25. Georgia v Hawaii

Why? After Boise St > Oklahoma Georgia will not be taking this game lightly.

Why Not? Colt Brennan. If he’s as a good as June Jones says he is he could put up 4 td on rout to a W.

24. Missouri v Arkansas

Why? Arkansas has no reason to get up for this game while Missouri wants to set the stage for next year.

Why Not? Darren McFadden.

23. Boston College v Michigan St

Why? Matt Ryan.

Why Not? Michigan St wants to make Mike Valenti proud.

22. Utah v Navy

Why? Utah has players and Navy is without Paul Johnson.

Why Not? Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada runs a solid option.

21. Kentucky v Florida St

Why? Rich Brooks thinks this whole post is BULLSHIT!

Why Not? Florida St may have some stud player getting the opportunity to make plays since 1/2 their team is suspended.

20. Georgia Tech v Fresno St

Why? PAT HILL SCHEDULES GAMES AGAINST ANYONE, ANYWHERE! THIS GAME IS NO DIFFERENT. PREPARE TO BE THUNDERSTUCK RAMBLIN’ WRECK!

Why Not? Chan Gailey is gone.

19. West Virginia v Oklahoma

Why? West Virginia cannot effectively execute its sex-cellent spread offense against any respectable defense.

Why Not? The departure of Rich Rodriguez has lit fire (started by a couch) under the Mountaineers’ asses.

18. Texas Tech v Virginia

Why? Texas Tech Oggles UVA Poon and Michael Crabtree.

Why Not? Its against my nature to say one positive thing about Virginia Football.

17. Tennessee v Wisconsin

Why? For some reason Wisconsin wins these type of games.

Why Not? Because God hates me for picking against the SEC.

16. Indiana v Oklahoma St

Why? Because the game will not be won by placing a round ball through a netted hoop.

Why Not? It’s fucking Indiana what do you want me to say? They may have some of that Oregon weed imported.

15. Penn State v Texas A&M

Why? The Aggies shot their wad against Texas.

Why Not? Penn State is just is an equally horrific team.

14. Purdon’t v Central Michigan

Why? Joe Tiller’s who basketball on grass philosophy is right up there with the Earth is flat.

Why Not? Its directional Michigan.

13. Brigham Young v UCLA

Why? There was a Mormon in my freshman English class who flipped his shit when someone suggested Mormons had multiple spouses. I saw the same 20/20 special so I don’t know what to believe anymore.

Why Not? Fucking UCLA was a preseason dark-horse of mine and could now prove people wrong. They’ve got fucking talent.

12. UCF v Miss St

Why? Everyone gets Croomed! Including, but not limited to: you, me, the guy at the deli cutting your cold-cuts, your 9th grade English teacher, marathon runners, truck drivers, porn stars, Al Skinner, the LL Bean Catalog, Best Buy, google “lemon party”, turduckens, laser discs, blu ray, iPhone, AP Physics AB exam, etc…

Why Not? Kevin Smith can pound the rock.

11. Clemson v Auburn

Why? Auburn is able to win a close game by controlling the ball with its talented offensive line and stable of running backs.
Why Not? Cullen Harper is able to win a close game with the 2 minute drill.

10. TCU v Houston

9. Tulsa v Bowling Green

8. Connecticut v Wake Forest

7. California v Air Force

6. Maryland v Oregon St

5. Arizona St v Texas

4. Nevada v New Mexico

3. Southern Mississippi v Cincinnati

2. Florida Atlantic v Memphis

1. Alabama v Colorado

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