With his halftime success CollegeGameBalls has learned that Coach Holtz will start giving pep talks outside of college football starting this off-season. Here are two of the groups we can expect to benefit from the Coach’s pep talks.
Sufferers of male urinary symptoms due to BPH
Men, it is our time to go and I believe we are going to be able to go, whenever wherever with no problems and here’s why. We have been training hard. We have been drinking 40oz of water in the morning then pissing, drinking 60 oz of water in the afternoon then pissing and drinking 80oz of water in the evening then pissing. That is a lot of water and lot of pissing. We have trained our bodies to know what to do, just like our cars. Men when you get up in the morning and leave for work you know you car is just going to go. You don’t worry about what happens if it doesn’t work, because it always does. You get in start it and hit the gas and it goes. Whether it is at the gym, your boss’ Christmas party or the ally behind Kelley’s Pub I believe we will all be able to just go when the time to urinate comes. Now get out and go!
Obese Children
Young men, being fat is not an option and it is not a way of life. Now tubbies I know it is going to be a tough road ahead, but if you listen to me I have all the faith in the world you can be normal again. There are three key words we need to live by if we are going to win this battle: resist, exercise and project. First we must resist the food that got us here in the first place and eat healthier. Do not take seconds on momma’s three cheese macaroni or even firsts and put down that box of cookies after school. Second we all need to exercise. Now I know we’d all much rather be playing our Atari or using the computer, but get outside and sweat. Third we must mentally project where we want to be and how we want to look. Does anyone here want to grow up and look like Charlie Weis, Mark Mangino or Phil Fulmer? I didn’t think so. I believe in you young men, resist, exercise and project!
1ara on Oct 6, 2007 at 4:29 am:
lou holtz is a crazy old man. nice blog, we should exchange links. I’m at http://www.onthebuzzer.com. let me know if you’re interested.